We all have many parts. We grow up and experience different things in life, leaving us with parts of ourself that create different meaning along the way. We often have our inner child part, our adult part, our playful part, our angry part, etc. When we don't acknowledge them as different parts of ourselves they often get louder and louder as voices in our head. Let me be clear, these are not actual voices, but more so persistent thoughts that effect how we feel about ourselves.
Many struggle with a few parts from the past impacting their current experience. What if we give a voice to these different parts so that they don’t have nearly as much as control?
In working with my clients, I often notice how when they keep things bottled up inside, their secrets have that much more power over them. But once they identify them out loud, their pull is much weaker. I help my clients to name their feelings in order to gain understanding of them.
We can take a similar approach to our parts so that they do not control the way that we think. For example, many of my clients describe a voice in their head that is negative and mean, often criticizing them and telling them they are not good enough. This is called negative self- talk. It often stems from a culmination of negative past experiences, insecurities and fears. It can have quite an impact on us if we let it.
But rather than allowing it to dictate our beliefs, lets name it. I often suggest that my clients create a name that fits for them. Some call it curse words while others use names that they don't find particularly attractive. The most important part of this exercise is naming it something other than yourself so you can begin to identify it as something separate from you and your own voice. This way you can choose to turn the volume of this other voice up or down like a TV remote.
Give it a try and let me know how this works for you!